what about now

Have you thought about how it would have been? How it would have been if you had gone back with your word and did what you promised? Our happiness. But I think you were too proud for that.

How would it have been if I had gone after you? Like the people say, just like an abandoned dog after his owner. I would have been more broken at the end!

How it would have been if we had stick together? Our ending would have been later on?

How would have been if you didn't have broken my heart that much so it will take me years to heal it? My dear essence.

You know those times when you feel so chained and you can not even speak about what is making you feel like that? Those are the times when you write and transform it into words instead of sounds.

I couldn't keep it to myself when my floor was being taken under my feet.

I couldn't keep it to myself when my world suddenly crushed.

I couldn't keep it to myself when you broke my heart.

I couldn't keep it to myself when you left and run away.

But I found myself again, not because you came and stayed this time because I couldn't keep it to myself. So I wrote it down. I just couldn't keep it to myself anymore.

I wish I could just write every single detail, but just for me, so I don't forget anything and when time goes by and I don't remember you, that will make me remember every good and bad time we had together. That way I won't forget you and our love.

Somehow I did it too. I hied them, I buried them and somewhere during the time I totally forgot about them.

What happened to us?

Where did we forget about love?

When did we forget each other?

I like to think that we were too young to deal with it but were we? I never asked what you thought about it.

We were teenagers, but love doesn't choose age, so what happened would happen now that we are older. What would happen now that we have grown up?

Maybe even now that we are older it wouldn't work well!

Maybe we need to grow a little bit more!

Maybe when we are twenty, maybe when we're thirty!

Maybe then it will work, maybe we just have to wait!

Maybe that's what God wants!

Maybe that's what we need!

But what about now? Are we going to be in separate ways forever? Are we just going to forget the friendship?